


All that matters is my heart

by sugarsweet_19



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: After Life, Drama, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-02
Updated: 2016-05-07
Packaged: 2018-06-05 23:34:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 18,274
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6727828
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sugarsweet_19/pseuds/sugarsweet_19
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Regina Mills is the ceo of her own publishing company. She's the evil queen to most of her employers. The evil queen without a heart, but did she prove them wrong by getting a heart attack. Lying in the hospital she meets a mysterious blonde that will change her life forever.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Can these idiots do nothing right? Regina asks herself while watching her employees argue. Regina Mills was the Owner and CEO of Mills publishing. A company build from the ground up by her father and given to her when he died. Regina was also known as the evil queen of publishing, she could convince every writer to sign with her company and if they didn't. Well she would surely make sure that they didn't get signed anywhere. Well you can't get successful with making some enemies, right?

Regina glares around the room and watches how all her editors made up excuses for not doing their jobs. They were supposed to sign with Granny Lucas two weeks ago and yet none had succeeded. Granny Lucas was the number one home cooking chef and Regina wanted her book, they couldn't let a rival company snatch her away.

"Shut up!" Regina demands directing the attention of every person in the room back to her. "You are all useless idiots." She says before grabbing her phone and holding it up to her ear.

"Miss Mills, What are you doing." A courageous employer asks but Regina only had to glare his way for him to shut up.

"Hello this is Regina Mills CEO of Mills publishing. I would like to talk to Mrs. Lucas, please." Regina waited for her call to be transported to Mrs. Lucas office. Regina looked around the room and placed a smirk on her face. Yeah sometimes it was nice to be mean.

"Hello this is Regina Mills. Mills publishing has been contacting you for a while now and…" Regina listened and watched how everyone before her grew really pale, some of them swallowed hard.

"I see, well from now on you will only be working with me personally, Mrs. Lucas and I promise you, you will get the best treatment in the industry." Regina said her goodbyes and locked her phone. She breathed deep in and out before directing her gaze to Sidney Glass.

"Mr. Glass!" Regina raised her voice and stared him down. Sidney Glass looked like he was about to pee is pants. "Please explain why the manuscript of Mrs. Lucas had gone missing?"

Everyone looked at Sydney and the poor man was sweating extremely. "Well….miss Mills you see…..I …she…..I don't know how it went missing. I think that maybe one of the inters might have shattered it." Sydney says while swallowing to hydrate his dry mouth. There were bottles of water on the table but he wouldn't dare reach for one to help him relive this predicament.

"Well I can understand that yes but what I don't understand is that you waited two weeks to inform Mrs. Lucas of this …no wait! You didn't inform her no the poor woman had to call herself and ask if we are going to publish it and what did you answer her Sidney?" Regina asks, she looked really calm on the outside but inside she was furious of the lack of professionalism of her staff. Their attitude reflected on her and she couldn't let anyone think that she wasn't an absolute professional.

"I…I said she needs to send it again because we lost it." Regina raises her eyebrow making it clear to him she wants him the continue.

"And when she asked how that was possible I said that it was none of her business and if she wanted us the publish her book she needed to hurry up and send it in again." Sidney finishes knowing that his faith was sealed when Regina raises from her chair and places her hands on the table.

"If I ever hear any of you talk to a client in that way you will all follow Sidney's example." Regina says addressing everyone in the room. "Sidney you are fired, get out of this office and out of this building." Regina says raising her voice making sure that everyone heard her and they all new that she was serious.

"Pleas miss Mills! It was a mistake, I have a wife and children. I need this job please." Sidney begged.

"Well you should have thought of that sooner." Regina finishes and grabs her phone and papers before turning to leave the meetings room. She didn't care about how people were looking at her. She was the boss and she could do whatever she wanted. She was about to reach the door when Sidney decided to do the unthinkable, he tried to challenge her.

"You're evil. You're a awful boss and an awful person. No wonder you have no friends or family. You have no heart." Sidney sneers at her and Regina clenches her hand around the handle of the door. She squeeze her eyes shut. How dare he bring up her family and personal life. It was the only subject that could really hurt her and he knew this. Regina breathes deep in and out and let the words wash over her before releasing it. She turns and gets into Sidney's face. She knew how people thought about her. She knew that her hard behaviour and harsh ways were why she didn't have any friends. But she also knew that she didn't need any friends. It's not like she didn't try in the beginning. She had envisioned herself being a good boss, kind, a listening ear, a good leader but that hadn't worked out. They had tried to walk over her when she was kind, she lost a lot of deals being nice and she had learn over the years that if she wanted to build this publishing empire, she had to be mean and harsh.

"Listen here closely, you are a disgusting little man who thinks he can hurt me but guess what you're right I don't have a heart and your words can't hurt me. So use that little brain of yours and leave this office with some self-worth or try to make a fuss and I will call for security. It's your choice." Regina watches how the man before her crumbles. He gathers his things and leaves the office. Regina watches him leave with a smile on her face.

"Why the hell are you all still standing here." Regina asks at the people still in the room. They all jump and leave the room. The only person there is Regina assistant Charlotte who is visibly shaking. "Do you want me to get you something miss Mills?" She asks her voice trembling.

Regina glares at her before opening her mouth. "Yes I would like you to go to the …." Regina's face twitches when she feels a sudden sharp pain in her chest.

"Everything alright miss Mills?" Charlotte asks shocked to see the pain on Regina's face.

"Yes..Yes….I'm fine…..aaaahhhh." Regina clutches her chest and tries to steady herself by holding on to a chair. "Charlotte….I …need you…..to call an…ambulance." Regina manages to say before collapsing on to the floor.


	2. Chapter 2

"Miss Mills? Miss Mills can you hear me." A unfamiliar male voice makes his way into Regina's brain and she was relented to open her eyes. "Miss Mills can you open your eyes?" The voice asked again even though Regina was still tired, with this voice asking her things she wasn't going to get any sleep.

When she tried to open her eyes she was met with a bright light shining into them. "Can you please turn that light off." Regina groaned. The light was switched of and when the dark spots disappeared she could finally see where she was and what she saw she didn't like at all. Her eyes travel through the white hospital room. She looked down at her body and saw that she was wearing a hideous hospital gown. Regina looked back up at the doctor and felt herself getting angry.

"Why the hell am I in a hospital bed? But more importantly where the hell are my cloths." Regina looks down at herself and felt disgusted when she saw the hospital gown.

"Miss Mills you suffered a heart attack, do you remember what happened?" Regina looks at the doctor like he grew two heads. The reality only sank in when she moved and felt a sharp pain around her heart section. She looked down her shirt and saw white bandage on top of her chest. What did they do to her?

"I had surgery?" She asks looking at the doctor.

"Yes you have and you have been very lucky that your assistant called 911 so quickly because else you wouldn't have been here at all." He says smiling down at her but Regina could only scoff. "I'll remember that when the Christmas bonuses are handed out."

The doctor's smile disappears when he hears Regina's reply. He takes her chart and decided to start the medicine chat. "So miss Mills let's get serious. Your heart attack was pretty severe and we had to temporary fix your heart making sure that it can still do his basic function which his pumping blood through your system. In human language we had to scrap some bad tissue from you heart so it doesn't get to tired from pumping. But it's only a temporary fix you will need a heart transplantation in the long haul." Regina eyes widen while she listens to him.

"You heart is pretty damaged. I actually think you have been having small heart attacks which have cause all the damage. They are not so easily detected sometimes they just feel like heartburn but they do cause some damage and make your heart really tired." The doctor looks up from the chart and watches Regina's reaction. That was the most difficult part of his job seeing the reaction to bad news but Regina's reaction he did not expect. She started laughing.

"Are you alright ma'am?" He asks a little taken aback by her reaction.

"I just remember telling my employers before I collapsed that I don't have a heart and now you just proved me wrong. I have one, I really bad one." She explains laughing but after a few seconds the laughing stops and Regina settles with a neutral face.

"What happens now, doctor….?" She asks him.

"Whale, doctor Whale. Well we will put you on the transplant list. Because it's such an important organ it's going to be very difficult to find your match. I also think you should stay here for at least the next 12 hours so we can give you some more fluids and check on you but also so you can get some rest. You have a really high stress level.

"No! I can't stay here. I'm the CEO and the head editor of my own company! I can't stay in bed all day. I have meetings, book signings and…." Doctor Whale holds up his hand and shushes Regina.

"If you leave this hospital before the 12 hours are up and go back to the hectic life you have been living you won't make it through the next day. You will get an new heart attack and you will die!" He says sternly.

Regina huffs and fall back against her pillow. "Alright, I will listen but you better keep me alive."

So doctor Whale explained Regina a second time what is going to happen and what other options she could consider but it all came back to, that the heart transplantation was the best option. He asked if she wanted to call her family but Regina just called her assistant Charlotte and explained to her what happened. After doctor Whale left Regina kept on the phone for more than an hour commanding several things from Charlotte and making her hospital room into her new office. Charlotte was going to come to the hospital first thing tomorrow morning and when Regina got off the phone she let out a sigh. How did this happen, why does it have to happen now! She let herself fall back into her pillow and stares at the ceiling. Maybe karma has finally gotten to her. She turns her head and frowns when she sees a blonde woman standing at her door and looking inside.

"Excuse me? Can I help you or something?" She asks the blonde woman who looks at her in shock, the woman's mouth opens but nothing comes out. Regina rolls her eyes and sits up straight again. "Well? Please explain yourself." Regina asks again but the woman just turns around and walks away. Strange? Regina found it weird but didn't pay any more attention than necessary to it, she had bigger problems now. It was around five o'clock so Regina decided to spend her time doing something she normally didn't do. She started to travel through channels trying to find some educational programs but ended up watching CSI New York.

When it was around seven a nurse came in with food. "Good evening miss Mills." The nurse said haven looked on the chart for Regina's name.

"My name is Ruby. You will see me more often since doctor Whale put me on your case. So sorry to hear about your heart but don't worry doctor Whale is the best." Ruby says smiling but soon her smile disappeared when she was only met with an annoyed look.

"Alright I get it. Not really a social person, I know how to be a professional." Ruby says placing the board with food on Regina's side table in silence. Regina pulled to table closer to her and inspected the food. "What is this? Is this supposed to be food?" Ruby gave a chuckle.

"I know right, cut backs. No more than 2 dollars a meal. It taste like crap but it does have all the vitamins and calories you need to get better." Ruby opens the little fridge in the room and place a bottle of water in front of Regina.

"Don't forget to hydrate. I'll come back later when you're finished your meal. And to change the bandaged around your chest." Ruby says leaving the room. Regina bravely eyed the food again and started poking in the thing that was supposed to be meat. "I can't eat that." Regina says to no one in particular but still she was met with a chuckle. When she looks up she sees the weird blonde again.

"Who are you? What are you doing here." Regina asked again just like last time but also like last time the blonde just turned and walked away.

"Seems like someone escaped form the psychiatric department." Regina says pushing the side table away and ignoring the food. She settles on watching TV again until she falls asleep. Sometime during the night Regina wakes up by a sudden feeling. She slowly opens her eyes and she could swear she saw the blonde woman standing at the foot of her bed looking at her while she slept. But when Regina managed to sit up straight and wake up a little better, the woman was gone yet again.


	3. Chapter 3

"Good morning miss Mills." A wide awake Ruby calls out opening the curtains and blinding Regina with the light. "I do hope you slept well, I will bring your breakfast in a second." Regina watches astounded as the Brunette nurse leaves her room already. Regina let's out a yawn and stretches. She groans a little as the movement causes her some pain. She pushes the sheets of her and walks to the bathroom. She looks in the mirror and feels embarrassed by seeing herself looking so dishevelled in the ugly hospital gown. She will be so much happier when Charlotte brings in some of her own clothes.

When she exits her room and makes her way back to her bed she is surprise to see that breakfast has already been brought in. Regina looks at it and is happy that it doesn't look as disgusting as last night's dinner. Although it could also be the fact that she's famished and that being hungry makes the meal look so much better.

At exactly five minutes past ten Charlotte her assistant arrives with bags holding some things Regina had asked for. Regina raises her eyebrow and chuckles when she sees that the timid girl almost stumbles trying keep the bags from falling.

"Good…good morning miss Mills." She says while looking down, too afraid to make eye contact. "Good morning Charlotte, did you bring everything I have requested?" Regina asks eying the bags.

"Yes ma'am, I do think so. I have brought you bathroom supplies, most of the clothes out of your closet, pyjama's and I brought you your laptop and the several files you requested." Charlotte hands Regina the files and her laptop knowing that the woman wanted to check up on her business as soon as possible. "I also took some time to draft out a proposal for the deal you wished to make with Granny for the home cooking book."

"Perfect!" Is the only thing Regina says. No sign of appreciation as she starts her laptop and organizes the files. Charlotte who is use to never getting a compliment starts opening the bags and organizes Regina's clothes in the tiny hospital closet.

"Seems like everything is still standing." Regina comments when she travels through her mails.

"Yes miss Mills. Although there have been some rumours about Mister Scott. It seems like he wants to promote himself has head editor." Charlotte says when she finishes putting the last item of clothing in the closet. Regina raises her eyebrow. "Are you saying that….." Regina wants to comment on Charlotte statement when a flash of golden hair passes her door.

"Did you see that?" Regina asks pointing at the door making Charlotte look up.

"What, Ma'am?"

"A woman has been annoying me. I don't know who she is but she has been watching me since yesterday." Regina explains. "Charlotte go look in the hall and see if you can find her."

Charlotte hurries outside and walks up and down the hall but can't find a woman with blonde hair.

"I'm sorry ma'am, I think she's already gone." Charlotte tells Regina when she comes back into the room. "Are you sure you saw her?" Charlotte let slip and as soon as she said it she could see Regina's face go from bored and annoyed to anger.

"What are you saying? Charlotte!" Regina asks raising her voice and staring Charlotte down. "Are you implying that I imagined her? That I'm going crazy?" Regina can see how Charlotte bottom lip starts to shake and her eyes are getting moist.

"Oh, please for Christ sake don't start crying!" But as soon as Regina speaks out the last word Charlotte whips away her first tears.

"Get out and go back to the office. And tell mister Scott that he better do the job he has been hired to do. I am and will be the head editor." Regina says and Charlotte takes her coat and leaves the room. Regina sits back against her headboard and sighs. Why does she has to work with these idiots. If the girl is ever going to work herself up to a position of power, she is going to need to grow a pair.

"You should be kinder to her you know!" Regina turns her head to the voice and is visible surprised when she sees the blonde woman again.

"Excuse me?" Regina asks.

"I said you should be kinder to her. She works hard." The blonde walks in the room and sits down on the table under the television.

"Who said you were allowed in my room?" Regina looks the blonde up and down. She's wearing a plain t-shirt and skinny jean, she has golden blonde hair and grass green eyes. Regina has to admit to herself that the girl is beautiful.

"Who said I'm not allowed?" The girl fires back.

"I say, this is my room." The girl chuckles and folds her arms across her chest.

"Do you own the hospital miss Mills?"

"No I don't and how the hell do you know my name? Who are you?" The girl just keeps chuckling at Regina irritation.

"Your name is on the chart at the door." She says and walks over to the window to look outside. "You have a great view here. Better than my room." She says and lets her fingers trail over the glass.

Regina huffs. "Are you going to tell me your name or do I have to call the nurse and say that one of their mental patients has escaped." The girl snaps her head up to Regina and for a minute she thinks the girl is going to yell at her but instead she just starts to full-on laugh.

"Hahaha, your funny. I like that. The name is Swan, Emma Swan." Emma says and takes a seat by the window.

"Well miss Swan. Can you please explain to me why you are in MY room?"

"Just thought you could use a friend." Emma says sincere.

"I don't need a friend, so you can go now." Regina says rolling her eyes and reaching over to the side table to take her laptop again.

"You look like you need one." Emma says passing Regina and walking out her room again. Regina looks at the door where she just saw the blonde disappear. Who the hell does she think she is. I don't need a friend and I certainly don't look like I need one.

But still the small comment haunts Regina. She swings her legs out of the bed and makes her way over to the bathroom. She looks in the mirror and whines at the site of herself. Her hair is greasy and her eyes are red-rimmed. She goes back in her room to collect some proper clothes and shower supplies before making her way back to the bathroom.

Around noon Regina was feeling much better. She had showered and put on her make-up before gathering her computer and start skyping with her assistant. Ordering her around and making sure that people still knew that she was running the show.

"Hello Regina, how are you feeling today?" The happy nurse Ruby asks when she walks in and puts Regina's meal on her side table.

"How do you think I'm feeling? I'm stuck in this bed and I can't even work properly. You wifi server is terrible." Regina sasses. Ruby rolls her eyes and grabs Regina's laptop. She puts it away and pushes Regina side table closer.

"Excuses me! I was working on that!" Regina raises her voice and gawks at the brunette. How dare she put away her laptop. Regina looks down to her meal and cringes her nose. And how dare she put something so disgusting in front of me….again.

"What is this supposed to be?" Regina asks poking with her fork in the meal.

"Massed potatoes, broccoli and some salmon." Ruby explains politely.

"Well I'm not going to eat that!" Regina says pushing the plate away.

"You're not getting anything else until dinner. I suggest you eat it." Ruby takes Regina's chart and checks the test results.

Regina who doesn't care about the nurses opinion grabs her phone and start typing an e-mail. Ruby watches Regina's for a second before she just shakes her head, grabs the plate and leaves the room.

Not long after Ruby is gone Regina feels eyes on her again. When she looks up and sees the weird blonde by the door she sighs.

"What do you want now?" Regina asks frustrated. She looks back down at her phone and continues typing. The blonde walks further in the room. When she crosses the room Regina can't help but follow her with her eyes.

"Aren't you going to answer my question?" Regina asks more frustrated because NOW the blonde decides to ignore her?

"No!"

"What the hell is wrong with you? Are you mentally ill?" At the statement the blonde starts to laugh.

"No, I'm not."

"Then what are you trying to accomplish here?" The blonde is again staring out of the window. She looks in deep thought. Regina shakes her head and crosses her arms over her chest.

Emma turns around, leans against the wall and watches Regina. "What's wrong with you?" She asks and Regina is shocked by the genuine concern in the others woman's voice.

"I don't think that's of any concern to you." Regina says and locks down at her phone.

"Please tell me." Emma tries again and pushes herself of the wall. She walks towards Regina's bed and sits down in the chair next to it.

Regina opens her mouth but doesn't know what she should tell the blonde. Her first reaction is to snap at her and demand her to leave her room but something is holding her back. It has been so long since someone showed any really interest in her.

"I…my…..heart. It isn't strong. I need a new heart." Regina mumbles quickly. She puts her head back down and starts typing.

"Can you stop typing for a second and put that damn phone away." Emma says loudly. She feels irritated by Regina disinterest in her own condition. Why doesn't she care about herself? This is a severe condition, she could die and she doesn't even care. The only thing she cares about is that stupid phone and her job.

Regina is startled by Emma's loud comment and puts her phone down. "What?"

"You could die you know that right?" Emma says looking into Regina's eyes.

Regina rolls her eyes. "Of course I know this. And there's nothing I can do about it right know. So what's your point?"

"What if I told you that I could give you a heart." Emma says looking Regina death in the eye. "What if I told you I could give you my heart."

Regina's eyes grow wide in astonishment. "You are crazy! Aren't you?" Regina finally manages to blurt out.

Emma stands up and walk towards the door. "I'm in room 108, if you want to know more, come and find me." Emma walks out the room without saying anything else.

Regina kept staring at the door not knowing what to do now. The other woman must be completely crazy. Or maybe she's not crazy maybe she's dying and she wants to donated her heart to Regina. But why would she want to donate it to her. Regina wasn't a good person and she wasn't even friendly towards to blonde. Regina can't take it anymore. She is not normally a curious person but sitting here and not knowing what the blonde means is going to drive her crazy.

Regina walks out of her room and makes her way towards the rooms with numbers 100 to 150. It doesn't take her long to find the room the blonde told her about and when she does, she isn't prepared to find what she's seeing.


	4. Chapter 4

Her mouth drops open slowly as she takes in the sight before her. She sees the same blonde curly hair and light pink skin. She hears the beeping of the machine and watches how it's pumping air into the lungs of the body that is lying in the bed.

It's the same woman, Emma. The woman who has been irritating her for the past two days. Her eyes are closed and Regina misses seeing the grass green eyes looking at her.

She doesn't understand. Why is she lying here, why are all these tubs and fluids going into her body? Regina walks closer to Emma and without any reason her hand reaches out. She wants to touch the blonde's skin, just to make sure that's she's not dreaming. That what's she's seeing in real.

But before Regina can do just that, a voice stops her. "What are you doing?" A harsh voice, Regina turns around startled. A little brunette is looking at her wary. She's older that Regina and her brown hair that used to be a dark brown is slowing fading into grey. They have the same features, Regina thinks. This must be Emma's mother.

"I'm sorry. I just wanted to wake her up." Regina says explaining her present in the room.

The brunette eyebrows shoot up and anger flashes in her eyes. "Excuse me?" The woman raises her voice. "Is this some sick joke? Who the hell are you?"

A little taken aback by the woman's outburst Regina takes a step back and holds her hands up in surrender. "I'm sorry. It's just, she has been irritating me for the last two days and I want her to stop being foolish."

Pure anger can been seen in the woman's eyes. "Get out!" She points to the door and walks closer to Regina, who can only keep walking back. "Get! Out! Now!" The brunette is thin and tiny but the power she holds in her voice is like an army commander who is barking out orders.

Scared for her own life Regina turns around and quickly walks out of the room and hurries back to her own room. She doesn't understand what just happened. She needs to lie down for a second maybe she's that one that's going crazy.

But when she enters the room, she is positive that she has indeed gone bonkers. Emma is sitting crossed legged on her bed and is wearing a small smile and something the represents hope in her eyes.

Regina stops and freezes. "How? You! What?" Emma pushes herself of the bed and walks closer to Regina.

"Calm down, it's okay. You're not going crazy, trust me." Emma tries to ease the tension but she knows that it probably won't work with Regina.

"I'm not going crazy!" Regina yells. "I just saw YOU! Lying in a bed and it looked like you were death or in a coma or something! And now you're sitting here all fine and I'm not going crazy?"S he runs a hand through her short hair and breaths deep in and out.

"I can tell you all I know but I need you to calm down first." Emma points to Regina's chest. "Think about your heart." Regina rolls her eyes and wants to keep yelling but she doesn't because she knows that it will not accomplish anything.

She takes a seat in the chair across her bed and folds her hands on her lap. "Please explain." Regina asks much calmer but inside she feels like a bomb that is about to explode.

"Alright, so I'm not dead. I'm in a coma, I have almost no brain activity left. Eight months ago I was in a car accident with my mother. She was driving and a truck hit us. I had a severe concussion but I was awake and alert. I got a head CT and beside having the concussion they saw that I had a tumour. Basically the short story, they operated on me removed the tumour and I didn't woke up. They tried but still nothing.

The day you saw me and talked to me, I totally freaked out. That's why I have been coming back to you. You are the only person I can talk you. I don't know why I'm here, I don't know why you can see me. I just know that you need something and I can give it to you." Emma finishes her explanation. Seeing Regina's astounded face she quickly adds. "Please believe me."

Regina's eye's blink rapidly. She watches Emma's pleading eyes before pinching herself between the eyes focusing on trying to keep herself sane.

"You know how insane this is right? It's impossible!" She says will giving Emma a weird sarcastic laugh.

"How do you think I must feel? I thought being in a coma was darkness, just being lifeless. But I have been walking around these halls for so long as a ghost. And I'm tired of fighting and waiting for my body to connect with me again. I'm ready to say goodbye and I need your help to do this because for some strange reason you're the only person I can talk too. And you need my help also because I have the thing that can keep you alive, I have a healthy heart." Emma finishes her speech and Regina can only see hope and despair in her eyes.

"Alright! Let's say for now that I believe you and I accept your offer. What do you want me to do?" Regina asks knowing that nothing comes for free.

"I want to give my heart to a person who really deserves it. And right now, you are not that person." Regina huffs and rolls her eyes. She's ready to say something back and defend her actions but Emma's holds up her hand.

"Tomorrow you will be discharged. I want you to do exactly what I say for the next three days. If I say jump, you will. If I say you have to eat a filthy greasy burger, you shall. If I say you should treat your secretary better, you will." Emma finishes with a grin. "Do we have ourselves a deal?" Emma asks hopeful and looks Regina in the eyes.

Regina bites her lip. Three days of doing what this girl wants and in exchange she gets her life back. Well I guess it's worth the risk. Regina holds out her hand as to struck the deal but Emma just looks at her with an annoyed look.

"I can touch you but you won't feel it." Emma explains. Holding out her hand as well. Regina watches how Emma's puts her hands in hers but just like Emma says she doesn't feel anything. It's weird seeing something touching you but nothing feeling it.

Regina retracts her hand and looks up in Emma's eyes. "You have yourself a deal, miss Swan."


	5. Chapter 5

So this is your pager. If we find a heart for you, we will contact you." Doctor Whale hands Regina the black devise. "Thank you doctor." Regina says putting the pager in her bag and gathering the last of her things.

"Do you want me to go ahead and put your bags in the car, miss Mills?" Charlotte asks.

"Yes." Regina says. She hears a small cough and looks into Emma's direction who is standing by the window. Regina gives her a 'What now?' look.

"Aren't you going to say thank you?" Emma asks making Regina roll her eyes but she does what Emma ask. "Charlotte." She calls out before Charlotte can leave the room.

"Yes miss Mills?" Charlotte asks.

"I just wanted to say." Regina looks at Emma again and takes a deep breath. "Thank you, dear."

Charlotte's mouth falls open in shock but the girl snaps herself out of her shocked state quickly and the shock turns into a bright smile.

"Your welcome miss Mills." The girl says beaming an leaves the room with a little skip in her step.

"Did you see that?" Emma asks with a smug face. "You just made someone really happy by only saying thank you. Doesn't that feel good?" Emma asks wondering.

Regina looks Emma up and down before saying. "Hardly." Regina takes her handbag and leaves the room as well.

Emma rolls her eyes. Baby steps.

When they walked out of the building the sun was shining brightly and Emma missed the feeling of the warm streams on her skin. She watched Regina walked towards a large town car. When the brunette was almost at the passenger door, a large muscled man quickly made his way around it and opened the door for her. Emma started laughing very loudly making Regina spin around and glare at her, forgetting for a moment that she was the only one that could exactly see her.

"Why the hell are you laughing." Regina snaps at her but before the blonde could reply the driver cleared his throat. "Miss Mills? Are you okay?" He asked tentatively. Regina's eyes grew wide when she realised what she just had done. She must look like a crazy person. She could feel herself grow red from embarrassment. She turns around and looks down, avoiding any eye contact with her driver. She didn't say anything else and step inside the car. She was Regina Mills, she didn't have to explain herself to anyone.

When Regina was secured in the car and the little shield that separated her and the driver was up, she turned her body to Emma.

"What the hell were you laughing about?" Regina asks the blonde irritated. Emma snorts at seeing Regina's irritated face.

"I'm sorry, I just found it so typical that you would have your own personal driver to drive you around." Emma explains and still can't help herself from laughing.

"I hardly think it's that comical." Regina growls and turns away from Emma to look out of the window.

"Oh no, that's wasn't indeed so comical but the face you made when your driver asked if you were fine that, that was so funny. You were so red!" Emma keeps grinning and the only thing Regina can think of to do is roll her eyes.

"You are such a child!"

"And the problem with you is that you are not!" Emma's fires back. Why can't this woman lighten up for just a second.

"Thank god for that!" Regina says wanting to have the last word.

Emma huffs and crosses her arms. Why does she have to be like this? Why is she so up tied. She doesn't laugh and she doesn't appreciate the things people do for her. Why I'm I doing this again? Maybe I shouldn't waste my time and just give up. Maybe there's a reason why she's about to die. Maybe she deserves it.

Emma shakes her head. No she's can't think like this. She has to give Regina a change. There is something about the stuck up woman. It's buried deep inside but there is definitely something and that's what Emma wants to find.

"Tell your driver to go to 106 StoneStreet." Emma says breaking the silence but without looking at Regina.

"What?" Regina asks.

"Tell your driver…"

"I heard what you said the first time. Where are you taking me?" Regina questions.

"I'm not going to tell you. You just going to have to find out." Emma states coldly.

"And what if I refuse." Regina says and this makes Emma turn back to her.

"Then I guess you don't need my heart anymore." Emma raises her eye brown and waits for Regina next move. Regina sigh deeply and knocks on the shield. The shield is lowered down and Regina tells her driver the address. She just hopes that this is all worth it.

"No! Hell no!" Regina says when she's standing in front of the large building. It's huge and the bright letters FUN HOUSE are staring right at her.

"Hell yes!" Emma says standing next to Regina with her hands in her side. Fun House is an indoor amusement park with roller coasters and other fun stuff. When Emma was twelve her mother took her here for her birthday. It was her best birthday ever because it was just her and her mother. And that day she got the change to completely relax and forget the fact that her dad her left her and her mom.

"It's going to be so much fun. Come on!" Emma tries again to convince Regina.

"For you it's fun. No one can see you. If I go in I'm the weird old lady, who is talking to herself."

Emma raises her eyebrow. "And you care about that because?"

"Because I'll be embarrassed." Regina says while fidgeting nervously with the sleeve of her blouse.

"Don't be! Come one, live a little." Emma winks at Regina challenging her to do it.

Regina scoffs at Emma but raises her chin and walks inside the Fun house.

The moment the doors open the hallowing sound of children, laughing, crying and running is making its way through her ear canal.

"Race you to the roller coaster." Emma says and takes off. Regina rolls her eyes, no way that she is going to run like a child through this building. She walks behind Emma but unknown to herself it's just a little faster.

Regina looked up and her mouth was hanging open. She had imaged the rollercoaster to be smaller and more for kids but looking at the thing she felt a little nervous going on it.

"Come on what are you waiting for?" Emma asks standing next to Regina.

"I'm hoping for you to change your mind!" Regina replies hopeful. Regina bites her lip and moves to the wait line of the attraction. There are just a few children with their parents in front of her. When the previews ride arrives back in the station there is a little commotion in the front of the waiting line that catches Regina's attention.

"Sorry kid if your under twelve you need adult supervision. I can't let you on the ride." The guy who manages the ride says to a small boy.

"Oh please, I'll be safe." The boy pleads but the guy still doesn't allow him on the ride by himself.

"That's okay! I'll go with him." Regina says surprising the boy and herself.

"You will?" The boy asks hopefully. Regina nods and takes a seat on the ride. The boy beams at her and takes a seat as well.

"Thank you! Normally my dad would come." The boy says pointing at a man in the distance who is busy talking in his phone. "But he's too busy with work." Regina gives him a sad smile. She would probably be just like him if she would have any children. She's glad she made the decision to not have any children while she was too busy with her job. But now she wonders if she was ever not going to be busy with her work. If this plan works and Emma does give her a new heart that could be the first thing she could do different. Have a child and be there for them. The ride starts and Regina grips on the metal safety bar.

The whole ride doesn't even take 5 minutes but still Regina can't help but scream and laugh when it's go fast or down. The boy next to her scream with her and both are laughing genuinely when they arrive back at the station.

"That was awesome!" The boy yells putting his fists in the air.

"Yes it was wasn't it?" Regina says laughing.

"Let's go again!" The boy says turning to Regina and showing her is best puppy eyes. No matter what Regina is not going to be able to say no to this boy. So Regina and the boy go on the ride five more times until Regina gets sick and runs away to puke in a trashcan.

"No more rides!" Regina pleas and the boy smiles nodding.

"I know what will help your stomach." The boy grins and points at a food stand. "Ice cream!" He takes Regina's hand and pulls her over to the stand.

"So what's your name?" The boy asks sitting next to Regina while they both keep licking their ice cream.

"Regina and what's your name?" Regina asks a little timid.

"It's Henry." Henry replies and tries to lick his own chin feeling that ice scream and dripping down from it. Regina chuckles and grabs some paper tissues and whips away the mess he created.

"Well it's nice to meet you Henry." Regina holds out her hand and Henry takes it and shakes it.

"Nice to meet you too Regina! So how come you are here all alone?" Henry asks raising his eyebrow.

"A friend dared me to come by myself. She said I needed to let loose and have fun." Regina finishes her ice cream and starts cleaning her hands from the sticky mess.

"It sure looked like you had fun." Henry says smiling.

"I did, didn't I?" Regina could slap herself. She looked around and was happy to not see Emma's smug face staring at her right now.

"Henry! There you are!" A loud voice yelled. "I have been looking for you all over this place! I thought you were going to the chance games?" The man Regina presumed was Henry father walked up to them angry.

"And who the hell do you think you are? Buying my son ice cream! What are you? Some kind of pervert?" The man now turns his anger to Regina.

Regina wanted to snap at the man but Henry was quicker. "She's no pervert! She's Regina and she went with me on the roller coaster because you were too busy to actually spend any time with me!" The man's look softened and rubs his temples.

"I'm sorry Henry." He looked at Regina. "I'm sorry, thank you for taking care of my son. Come on Henry we need to go home." He held out his hand and waited. Henry turned to Regina and instead of only a goodbye he lifted his tiny arms and engulfed Regina in a hug. The brunette was to shock to return it but Henry didn't care.

"Thank you Regina! Have a nice day." Regina gave a genuine warm smile and nodded. "You to Henry."

Regina watched him and his dad take off and decided to go find Emma. She hadn't seen the blonde for a while now and she was starting to get worried. She found Emma sitting in front of the carousel, her eyes were closed and she swayed with the music. Regina took a seat next to her and watched how the horses went up and down.

"So how did you enjoy your ride on the roller coaster?" Emma asked breaking the silence.

"It wasn't a total nightmare." Regina answers honestly, there was no need to lie to Emma.

"I saw you sitting with that little boy." Regina hummed.

"You seemed to really enjoy your time with him. It's makes me wonder why you don't have any children?"

"I didn't want to raise a child when my job took up so much of my time. But now…" Regina sighed. "I don't think I have made the right decision. I should have friends, I should have a child, I should have a lover." Regina closes her eyes and feels tears coming. "What good is my life when I have no one to share it with?"

Regina was crying big tears now and Emma felt guilty. She wanted to show to woman a better way to living her life but she didn't mean to make her cry. She puts her hand on Regina's back to comfort her but of course the woman doesn't feel it and Emma curses the prison she is trapped in.

"Things are going to change. I'm going to help you change them. I want you to be happy Regina." Emma says and Regina looks up into the woman's eyes.

"But why? You have seen first handed how I treat people, how I have treated you. Maybe I don't deserve to be happy." Regina says taking a tissue from her purse and drying her tears.

"You do! Because the woman that was talking to this boy and went on a ride 5 times until she puked, that woman are you as well and she deserves to be happy. Let's get you home and some rest." Regina doesn't say anything to Emma's admission. The woman that talked to the boy was someone she had forgotten about a long time ago and it felt good bringing her out again.


	6. Chapter 6

"Rise and shine cupcake!" Emma shouts at Regina and jumps on the bed even though it doesn't do anything. Regina groans and turns around not wanting to get up just yet.

"Come on Regina! I know you don't sleep in so get up and make yourself some breakfast, we got a lot to do today." Regina pushes her hair out of her face and watches Emma.

"Are you serious?" Regina asks falling back into her pillows.

"Yeah so get up or you're not getting my heart!" Emma walks out of the room to give Regina her privacy while she starts getting ready.

Freshly washed and with a full stomach Regina finds herself standing on the sidewalk waiting for Emma's instructions for today. It's early and she doesn't feel rested but she's ready to go and listen to Emma throughout the day. She has made up her mind last night after she had gone to bed, she was going to do what Emma's says without complaining. Or at least not that much of complaining.

"So what are we going to do," Regina asks raising her eyebrow and putting her hands in her pockets to keep them warm. Without saying anything Emma starts walking and the only thing Regina can do is follow and roll her eyes.

"Today you are going to do some random acts of kindness."

"What? Why? What kind of random acts of kindness." Regina asks looking left and right before she crosses the street and catches up to Emma.

"Just random! Like…" Emma looks around and it doesn't take long for her to see what she has been looking for. Emma stops walking and turns towards Regina.

"I want you to take some money and give it to this homeless guy." Emma says pointing at the little old man sitting on his knees with his face looking down and a cup in front of him.

Regina frowns. The man is dirty and is hair is messy. She's sure he hadn't showered in days and did she just see some flees in his hair. Regina felt disgusted in the man's place.

"Why do I need to give him money? Don't you think that's a little easy for him. Why doesn't he go and find himself a job instead of sitting here all day and begging for only a scrap of money." Regina reasons with Emma.

All her life she had to work hard to get where she was now. She had earned her money and now Emma wanted her to just give it away like that. Who knows maybe this man didn't deserve the money, maybe he deserve the life he was living.

"Just do it Regina!" Emma says firmly. Regina huffs and walks over to the man. She opens her wallet and sees two bills in it. One of twenty dollars and a one hundred dollar bill. She takes out the one hundred dollar bill and puts it in the cup. She turns around and murmurs to herself. "At least people can't say I'm cheap."

Before she can walk away a hoarse voice calls her attention. "Excuse me ma'am but I think you have mistakenly put a large bill in the cup." The old man says holding out the bill for Regina to take it back.

"No, it's not a mistake." Regina replies giving him a reassuring smile. The man eyes widen and starting to get moist. "Thank you." He whispers, his voice full of emotion.

Regina nods politely feeling a little uneasy, due to the man's gratitude. "Don't mention it." She says and straightens her pants before walking back towards Emma.

"So how did it feel?" Emma asks grinning. She had followed the whole interaction and was pleasantly pleased with Regina's actions.

"It felt alright." Regina says looking down not ready to fully admit that seeing the emotions in the man's eyes felt really good.

"Come on Regina! You're feeling good!" Emma pushes her shoulder but of course nothing happened. Regina looks at her shoulder and starts laughing.

"Did you really just tried to push me?" Regina asks chuckling.

Emma rolls her eyes but can't help but smile herself. "Oh shut up! Let's go to the next stop." Regina keeps chuckling but follows Emma.

"Oh and before I forget! I want you to smile all day long and smile at people."

"What!" Regina eyes widen. "Why do I need to do that?"

"Because I like your smile, it's beautiful and I think people should see it." Emma replies honestly but as soon as the words leave her mouth Regina loses her smile and blushes furiously.

"Well…..I …..thank you." Regina mumbles taken back by Emma's compliment. No one has ever given her a genuine compliment like that and she feels uneasy.

"Hey don't lose that smile now!" Emma says and Regina can't help when she feels herself smiling again.

The next stop they were making made Regina really nervous. The building they were walking into was very familiar to her and the large white letters of Mills publication were staring at her while she bit her bottom lip. She liked doing these random acts of kindness but this was her workplace and people knew her here in a very different way.

She is for many of her employers the scary heartless boss that no one likes. What if Emma asked her to do something that will embarrass her. She needs to be taken seriously or her business will suffer.

"Please Emma don't make me do something that will make me appear weak. I still have to manage these people and I can't do that if you make me lose their respect." Regina says stopping Emma from going inside.

"Alright, why don't we go somewhere quiet so we can talk." Regina nodded, they left the lobby from the building and headed towards the bathroom. Regina check the bathroom but luckily for them no one was in.

"So….." Emma says crosses her arms. "Why are you so nervous? Please tell me what 's going on."

Regina looks down and pulls her sleeve. "I used to have a lot of problems when I first started as CEO. My father originally started the business and when I finished college my father died suddenly. Ironic enough he had a heart problem, maybe that's why I'm in this mess right now. I knew that one day I would inherit all of this but I hadn't expected it to be right after college. All of the sudden I'm the boss of so many employees and they didn't listen to me. They took advance of me, they made deals that got me into lot of trouble, legally and financially. I even got sexually harassed at one point but I don't like to talk about that." Regina whips away the tears that were falling down her cheeks.

"So I broke down, I had a complete nervous breakdown. I left the office for two weeks and got better. I knew I had to change, so I put on my walls and created this heartless workaholic bitch. And somewhere along the line I forgot that I'm not really that person. I want to be good and nice again but I don't want the problems to come back." Regina went into a toilet stall and gathered herself some paper to blow her nose.

"O god, I can't believe I'm crying right now." Regina mumbles.

"Hey! It's okay, you are allowed to cry. And thank you for telling all of this because from the moment I saw you I didn't believe this mask you were putting on, this bitch. I just didn't know why it was there in the first place and now I know, thank you." Emma steps closer to Regina. She wants to hug her but knows that she can't. Regina won't even feel it.

"You know what. I'm going to hug you. I know that you won't feel it but try to imagine it." Emma closes the space between them and puts her arms around Regina.

Regina sees Emma's arms around her but she doesn't feel the contact. She wished she could, she wants to feel Emma. She wants to feel her skin and her warmth. Regina closes her eyes and tries to imagine. She imagines how Emma would feel, how soft she is and how she would smell. It comforts her and she feels so much better.

"And don't worry. I'm not going to ask you to do anything that will embarrass you. We are here for something totally different." Emma whispers in Regina's ear before pulling back from the hug.

"I know you love your job but I also know you want something more than your job." Regina nods in agreement.

"You want to date, find someone to love and maybe even start a family. But a family takes up a lot of time. Time you don't have at the moment because of your job. So you are going to need some help. You need someone to take up some of the work you do. Let's go upstairs so I can tell you more about my plan." Emma says and points to the door.

They leave the bathroom and Regina leads them to the seventh floor. The moment Regina arrives on the floor and people see her things change. Regina's small smile disappears immediately and makes place for a frown. She doesn't walk but strides through the room towards her office. People look down at their computers trying to look as busy as possible. But the moment Regina's back is towards them they stop working and you see people relaxing again. Emma walks a little quicker to catch up with Regina.

"Hey Regina, calm down a little and don't forget or deal! Smile!" Regina stops for a second and gives Emma a little nod. She had forgotten herself for a minute but she wants to change so she starts smiling and nodding towards people in greeting.

"Good day miss Mills. I didn't know you were coming to the office today. Can I do something for you?" Charlotte asks looking up from her desk.

"No thank you Charlotte. I'm just going to do some work." Regina says giving her a genuine smile and stepping into her office. It's a large office, black and white colours are dominating and in the middle there's a large black desk. Regina takes a seat behind her desk and breaths deeply.

"So what's the plan?"

Emma doesn't take the seat in front of Regina's desk but goes over to sit on it. "Alright I want you to promote someone. Someone you can trust and can take up the work load and manage the office every time you want some free time." Emma explains and Regina listens.

"And you think you have found someone that can do that?" Regina asks raising her eyebrow in question.

"Yes I think that your assistant Jessica would be perfect. You don't know this but she has a degree in business and she respects you even though you scare her a little."

Regina frowns. "Jessica? I don't have an assistant named Jessica? My assistant's name is Charlotte."

Emma chuckles. "No, her name is Jessica. She has just never corrected you."

Regina mouths fall open. "O god! Really?" Regina feels guilty for not even knowing the girls name. "But are you sure that she can handle the job. If she doesn't even correct me with her name, what if she needs to make a deal and she let people walk over her." Regina asks sceptical.

"Yes that's true but if you maybe make her your something like an apprentice. You can teach her these things. You can help her built up her self-esteem. And she's really good at doing paperwork and organizing things. That's the person you need, someone to do the things that take up so much of your time."

Regina nods and brushes a hand through her hair. "I don't know….This….." Regina points around her. "This is my life…what if she ….."

Emma holds up her hand. "Yes I understand you and your totally right but if you want a life aside from this. That is what you are going to need to do."

Regina looks down and bites her bottom lip. She not sure.

"Alright don't do this because I asked you to but do this for yourself. Give yourself a change at a family. Who knows what you can do with more time. You could meet someone or if you want have a baby or adopt one."

Regina looks Emma in the eyes before nodding and reaching for her intercom button.

"Jessica can you please come in here for a second."

It didn't take long for Jessica to come in with her mouth dropped open. "Miss Mills? Did you just call me Jessica?" The girl asked looking at her boss with wide eyes.

Regina wants to roll her eyes but Emma catches her attention and points at her lips. "Smile." She says and Regina smiles back.

"Yes Jessica. That is your name, right?" Regina says.

"Yes but you normally call me Charlotte."

"Yes and I think it's time to change that." Regina says an points at the chair across from her. "Please take a seat, I need to discuss something with you."

Jessica takes a deep breath and sits down. "Am I going to be fired?" The girl asks nervously.

Regina laughs and shakes her head. "No of course not. You're here because I like to promote you. I want to offer you the job of becoming my apprentice. I would like to teach you how to manage an office like this and how to make the right deals and after that when you're ready I like to make you co manager of Mills publications."

Regina finishes and looks over at Emma who is giving her the thumps up and Regina can't help but smile even more.


	7. Chapter 7

After leaving the office Emma and Regina found themselves in Regina's favourite coffee shop. Well actually Regina had never been inside but they made her favourite coffee. Jessica always brought Regina coffee from there.

The delicious aroma from the coffee was hanging everywhere and Regina felt at ease just sitting there in the sun at the window.

"So…."Emma says breaking the silence. "How come you don't have someone in your life? You're really beautiful. Men must be lying around the corner for you." Regina almost choked on her coffee and looked at Emma with wide eyes.

"I….no…..not really." Regina says a small blush is covering her cheeks.

"Really? I can't believe that. Your gorgeous, successful, smart and really sweet if you want to be." Emma bluntly admits making Regina avert her eyes.

"Hey! Don't do that?" Emma says when she sees that Regina looks shyly away. "Don't look away like that when I compliment you. You are all those things Regina and you better start believing them."

Regina couldn't believe her ears. No one had ever so bluntly complimented her. Yes she knew she was attractive but no one ever looked beyond her looks and here was someone telling her all the things she wanted to hear and she had difficulty believing them.

"You need someone. And I'm going to help you." Emma says looking across the room for some possibilities.

"What about that guy there?" Emma says pointing to a guy in a suit who is sipping his espresso while texting.

"Or what about that guy?" Emma turns around and points to a bulky man who is still waiting for his order.

"Come on Regina take your pick?" Emma turns back to the brunette who is again pulling at her sleeve. Something Emma has notice to be a nervous habit of her.

"They are not really my type." Regina says.

"So tell me what is your type." Emma asks playfully sitting a little closer to Regina.

"I don't know." Regina says feeling nervous now that Emma is sitting so close to her. It's strange she knows that if Emma touches her she won't feel it but still the idea of Emma touching her sent shivers down her spine.

"Let me guess." Emma smiles putting her fingers against her chin while thinking and Regina can't help but find her adorable.

"I think masculine, brunette maybe?" Regina chuckles and shakes her head.

"Alright maybe blondes?"

"Maybe." Regina replies at Emma's guess.

"So blonde alright. So what about that guy there?" Emma says pointing at a blonde guy in sports gear. "He's blonde, sporty? Is that your type?"

"Well almost there is just one thing that bothers me about him." Regina says taking another sip from her coffee.

"Tell me." Emma asks enthusiastically.

Regina breathes deeply in and closes her eyes. "He's a guy." She finally says and it's so quietly that Emma had to lean in to actually hear it.

But when she does her lips form a small o. "Well….I can work with that. I'm Bi myself so I don't have a problem with it. So what about the barista herself? She's a blonde and she was really friendly to you when you ordered." Emma smiles and points at the little blonde barista.

"Yeah she's cute." Regina says. "But Emma, I'm just interested in a relationship right now. I want to get everything in order first.

"Alright I get it. Just promise me that you will find someone. Someone who tells you your beautiful every day. Promise me that."

Regina nods and promises this. When her coffee is finished they both leave the shop. They decided to get a cab back to Regina's apartment so Regina can get some rest. The whole cab ride they keep quiet because Regina doesn't want to look like a crazy lady. But it also gives her some time to get some things straight. Things like glancing over to Emma and smiling when she smiles back at her, liking how cute Emma looks when she's thinking or the way she genuine compliments Regina making her believe that she's a better person. Things that make Regina happy but so sad.

Regina decides to bury those feelings. Emma is in a coma and it doesn't seem like she will wake up, having feelings for Emma is something that will destroy her.

Regina was lying in her bed and wants her eyes to close but how hard she tired she couldn't fall asleep. Regina was really tired from today although she hadn't done much, she did feel like she had accomplish a lot. The day had been wonderful. She can't explain but doing those random acts of kindness warmth her heart. They remind her of the person she once was, the person she wants to be again. No not the person she wants to be again, she wants to be an even better person, someone like Emma. Someone who can see the good in each person. Could she be this person? Was she strong enough?

Regina turns under her sheets and sniffs. She feels her eyes getting moist and squeezes them shut, trying not to cry.

"There's nothing wrong with crying you know." Regina can hear Emma says from under her sheets. Emma stands at the door of Regina bedroom and watches the bundle under the sheets.

Regina whips her tears away before getting from under the sheets and sitting up against the headboard. "I wasn't crying." She says but her hoarse voice betrayers her.

"I always know when you're lying Regina. You are allowed to feel sad and to be vulnerable. You don't need to put up walls around me."

"I do." Regina thinks to herself because if I don't I might fall in love with you. Emma frowns when she sees Regina's shoulders shake and before any of them can utter a word Regina let's out a loud sob. "I'm afraid." She cries out between sobs. Emma hurries over to the bed and sits next to Regina on the bed.

She wants to comfort Regina, she wants to touch her. There's nothing in the world that she wants more right now. She wants to tell her everything is going to be fine. She is going to survive this and come out a better person. Emma doesn't say any of these things just watches with sorrow how Regina is hugging her own knees. When was the last time someone actually hugged her.

"What are you afraid of?" Emma asks. If she can't hug her Emma can at least be the person Regina can talk to. Regina lifts up her head and places it on her knees before staring out in front of her.

"Dying." She says.

"You're not going to die."

"Regina shakes her head and rolls her eyes. "The only way for me to live is if you die and give me your heart." Regina turns her head to Emma. "I saw so many people lying in those hospital beds. Children, they are waiting for a heart as well. They deserve to live, I don't! I have hurt to many people, was mean for too long. You have to pick one of them. I will die and I'm okay with that, I'm just …afraid."

Emma just stares at Regina not knowing what to say in this second. She wants to die and give the heart to someone else?

"Don't be afraid. I will be here and I'm not going anywhere." Emma finally says and they both lie down facing each other. Soon Regina tears stop falling and her breathing evens out. Emma watches her through the night with only one thought on her mind. "Regina doesn't got a say I this."


	8. Chapter 8

Waking up the following morning with grass green eyes staring into hers wasn't what Regina was expecting and she found herself longing to stay in bed and keep looking in them for the rest of her life. But the grinning face of a certain Emma Swan told her that this was not going to happen.

"Good morning, did you sleep well?" Emma asks scooting a little closer to Regina. Regina breath hitched at Emma's closeness. She wanted to feel Emma's warm breath against her skin. Regina scooted away from Emma and stood up.

"I slept well, thank you." Regina told Emma and grabbed her robe. "Have you been watching me all night. "Regina asks feeling a shiver run down her spine at the thought of Emma watching her. No she can't keep down this to herself, she had to stop these thoughts.

"Yeah I have and yeah I know I totally sound like a creep right know but in my defence you look so cute when you're sleeping, it's hard to look away." Regina had to bite her teeth, she couldn't hear these things, theirs is no way Emma and her are ever going to be together.

"I'm going to take a shower." Regina says and hurries into her bathroom, locking the door and resting against it. Why does she keep saying these things, why can't I just ignore everything she says. Regina turns on her shower and for the next ten minutes she let's all her thoughts go and when she is back in the bedroom she has her perfect mask on again and there is no way Emma is going to detect her feelings.

"So what's the plan for today?" Regina asks siting back on the bed and putting on some of the flats she found in the back corner of her closet.

"Today I need you to do some things for me. We are going back to the hospital and I want you to talk to my mother." Regina gulps and swallows.

"You…you want me to speak to your mother. Do I need to remind you about what happened last time. She yelled and scared the shit out of me."

Emma burst into laughter and clutches her stomach. "Oh god…please….hahaha…..don't…hahaha tell me your scared of my mother. You Regina Mills, the woman who can make a grown man cry is scared of my mother."

Regina rolls her eyes. "Don't you laugh at me Emma, she is scary. You didn't see the crazy look in her eyes when she saw me almost touching your face."

Emma shakes her head. "I'm sorry, you're right. Mom can be really protective at time but I promise you. I'll be there and I will tell you what to say."

Regina looks down and breathes in. She groans when she feels a little pressure on her chest but ignores if for now. "Alright, let's go."

When Regina entered the hospital again she was convinced that she didn't like hospital at all. It had a weird smell and people were sick or sad. No she definitely didn't like it here and having to go talk to Emma's mother wasn't making this visit any better.

They entered the elevator and Regina pressed the button to the third floor. She could feel herself sweat and her breathing was getting heavier. Emma saw how uncomfortable Regina was feeling and let her hand take hers.

Regina focused her eyes on their intertwined hands and looked up into Emma eyes and smiled. Emma was there with her and she was going tell her what to say to her mother. Regina gave Emma a nod showing that she was fine, things are going to be okay.

The elevator doors opened and Regina followed the signs to Room 108, just like last time Regina found herself frozen at the door when she saw Emma lying in the bed, looking pale.

"You okay?" Emma asks still holding Regina's hand.

"Yes I'm fine but it looks like your mother isn't hear yet." Regina says walking further in the room and taking a seat next to the bed.

"Yeah, she always comes around twelve o'clock. She has a lunch break from work and then she leaves and when work is over she comes back and stays with me until visiting hours are over." Regina nodded and looks at her wristwatch, they still had half an hour to go before she would show up.

"You know they should really brush you hair more often." Regina says looking at Emma's curly hair. She reaches out and brushes some pieces out of Emma's face.

"Wait! What did you just do!" Emma says raising her voice. Regina startles and retracts her hand.

"What? I …..just brushed some hair out of your face. What's wrong?"

Emma places a hand on her cheek. "I felt something. It tickled, I think I felt you touching me." Regina looks back at the Emma in the bed. She reaches forward again this time cupping Emma's cheek. Regina looks back to Emma and sees how the blonde's eyes grow really big.

"I can feel you! I can feel your hand." Emma enthusiastically says walking closer to Regina and behind her. "Do it again."

Regina reaches out again and this time she let only her fingertips trace the pale skin of Emma cheek. Regina turns to Emma and watches how Emma closes her eyes while Regina let her fingers trace over the skin again.

"This feels really good." Emma says opening her eyes again. "I have never felt this before. My mother would touch me but I never felt it."

"What do you think changed?" Regina asks still with her fingers on Emma skin. She liked how soft it was.

"I don't know. Maybe your just special." Emma says staring in Regina's eyes. She can see how Regina breathing changes and how the brunette let her eyes lingers on her lips. Emma knew she was being unfair to Regina, she could tell Regina was starting to feel things for her and Emma would be lying if she didn't felt the same way. In the beginning Emma had just been intrigued by Regina, she wanted to know the woman behind the walls and now that she knew her and she couldn't get enough of her.

"Excuse me, what are you doing." Regina snapped her eyes away from Emma's lips and felt herself back away from the bed when she saw the same brunette woman that had yelled at her.

"Don't be scared Regina." Emma says standing right next to her. "I'm right here for you."

Regina nodded and looked back at Emma's mother. "Good day, my name is Regina Mills." Regina says taking a step towards the woman and holding her hand.

"Yes and what are you doing in the room of my daughter, again." The woman asks looking Regina up and down.

"This is going to sound crazy but your daughter wants me to talk to you." Regina says breathing out.

"My daughter is in a coma and she's not waking up!" The woman says raising her voice making Regina flinch.

"Her name is Mary, tell her that Emmy loves her." Emma says looking at her mother. Regina can clearly see that the blonde is struggling to hold in her tears.

"Mary." Regina says and the use of her name makes Mary pause and look at Regina in confusion.

"How…"

"She wants me to says that Emmy loves you." Regina quickly adds making sure that the woman has heard her.

"Tell her that I'm fine and happy but that I'm ready." Emma says taking a step closer to her mother and letting her tears fall freely.

"She wants me to tell you that's she fine and happy but that's she's ready."

Emma dictates what she wants Regina to tell her while standing right in front of her mother.

"She's ready to go. She doesn't want to fight anymore and she wants you to go and live, she doesn't want you to be all about work and her. She knows about your co-worker David and she wants you to go out with him ." Regina can barely hold back her own tears when she sees how Mary's knees buckle and she needs to steady herself against the bed.

"She says that she loves you with all her heart and that she will always watch over you."

Mary is sobbing and holding her hands in front of her face. Emma bends down to eye level and places her hands on Mary's. "I love you mommy."

Regina can't take it any longer and leaves to room. She finds the restrooms and locks herself up in a stall. She holds her stomach and cries. Is this how it's going to be when she has to say goodbye to Emma? She can't do that, she doesn't want to.

"Regina?" Emma calls out for her. Regina sniffs and whips away her tears before opening the stall.

"I'm sorry, I just needed a minute." Regina says taking some paper and cleaning her nose. "Alright what's next?" Regina asks and puts on a brave face but inside she feels like she's crying her eyes out.

"Now we need to find a certain brunette nurse." Emma says and walks out of the restrooms with Regina following close behind her.

"So how do you know Ruby?" Regina asks looking at the tall brunette that is making goofy faces to a crying child.

"She's my best friend." Emma says laughing at Ruby's faces. "We went to school together. We were a dynamic duo, we played pranks and rebelled against the rules of the school. We were like soulmates but without the romantic part. I did try one time but she's straight and we work better as friends." Regina nodded. She wished she had a friend like that it would have made her high school experience much better.

"So what do we need her for?" Regina asks sipping from her thee.

"I need you to tell her about me. She needs to know that I'm here and I'm looking out for her and that I love her." Regina nods.

"How am I going to make her believe that it's really you?"

"Tell her…tell her that she can come into my room and talk to me. She hasn't been in there since the accident, I think I would be good for her. And tell her that she has to put her red streaks in her hair again, they suited her." Emma says.

Regina breathes in deeply and stand up. The child that was crying has stopped and a other nurse is taking to his room.

"Nurse Lucas?" Regina says and Ruby turns her attention to the other brunette.

"Miss Mills, is everything alright?" Ruby asks concern written over her face.

"Yes everything is just fine. I was wondering if I could speak with you for a minute?" Ruby nods and directs Regina to a chair in the family room.

"What can I do for you?" Ruby asks.

"This is going to be hard to believe but I need you to have an open mind." Regina gives Ruby a serious looking making sure that what she is going to say isn't a joke.

"Why haven't you been in Emma's room?"

Ruby's mouth drops open and she frowns. "How…..what?"

"Emma has been accompanying me for the last days. The first time I saw her was when I woke up from my surgery. She wants you to know that you can go in her room. She's still looking after you and she loves you."

Ruby can feel herself starting to breath quickly. This is a joke! This must be a joke, there no way in hell that Emma is….that's she's still here.

"I knew from the moment that I saw you that you were a mean person, miss Mills!" Ruby says standing up. "But I could never think that a person can be this cruel!" Ruby wants to turn but Regina's voice stops her.

"She wants you to put red streaks in your hair again! She says they suited you!" Ruby's eyes go wide and she is looking around to room not knowing what to think or do.

"How can you know that?" She whispers.

"She's telling me what to say. She has been telling me what to do and to say for the last days, it's actually really annoying." Regina explains.

Ruby chuckles. "Yeah! That's Emma!" She stops chuckling and frowns at her own reaction. Is she really believing this? How else would this person knowing these things.

"Alright! I need you to answer this question! If it's true what you are saying, only Emma knows the answer to this!"

Regina nods and looks to her right making sure that Emma is ready as well.

"When we were sixteen and my first boyfriend and broken up with me. Emma and I we made a pact, what was it!"

Emma is smiling at her friends question. "We made a pact that if we were single when we were forty we would marry each other. We kissed each other to seal the pact and it was my first kiss." Emma says remembering the memory.

"You two made a pact that you would marry each other if you were still single when you were forty. To seal the pact you guys kissed and it was Emma's first kiss." Regina repeats when Emma told her.

Ruby's hand goes up to her mouth and she gasps. "Emma! She's here!"

"Hey Rubes!" Emma goes to stand in front of her friends who is looking right through her.

"She says hey Rubes. And she's standing right in front of you." Ruby's hand goes up trying to feel something but it's only goes right through Emma.

"O god!" Ruby says and almost faints but Regina quickly picks her up and sit her down on a chair.

"Why is she here?" She asks Regina.

Regina waits only Emma explains but for she repeats what Emma told her.

"She says that she needs you to remember what she ones told you about dying and her funeral. But she also says that you can't tell me. Really miss Swan, I have been doing you biting for the past days. Why can't I know!" Regina asks turning to Emma. Ruby only watches with her mouth open.

"Fine alright! She can't tell me!" Regina huffs and Ruby chuckles.

"Really Emma, you sure you still want that?" Ruby asks.

"She says yes."

"And you sure you want her to be this person?" Regina looks at Ruby and then at Emma.

"What person I'm I?" Regina asks at Emma.

"That's what she can't tell me! Your such a pain in the ass Emma!" Regina says rolling her eyes. Ruby watches how Regina speaks and smiles to the invisible person sitting next to her and something click inside her something she knew really well.

"Regina?" Ruby asks and Regina turns towards her. "Do you like Emma?" Regina's eyes widen and she can feel herself blush.

"What?" Regina asks nervously.

"You like her!" Ruby exclaims again.

"Yes of course. she isn't really a pain in the ass, she's nice."

Ruby shakes her head and smiles. "You like 'like' her."

Emma who is following the conversation watches Regina reaction. The brunette is sweating and fidgeting with her fingers.

"Regina?" She whispers. Regina hears her but doesn't turn to her.

"She's my friend." Regina says to Ruby and looks down. "Your my friend Emma."

Emma flinches at the emotionless statement of Regina. She thought she had read Regina right. All the signs she has been giving her, the looks. Was Emma making this all up in her head.

"Do you want me to say something else?" Regina looks back at Emma.

"No that was all, she knows what to do." Emma says and she can't help but the hurt is clearly heard in her voice.

"Alright, miss Lucas. I thank you for your help. Emma and I have some other things to do." Regina says ending the conversation.

"Wait! Where is she standing?" Ruby asks and gestures into the room.

"She's standing at your right side and she's looking at you." Regina says and watches how Ruby turns her body towards Emma.

"I love you Emma." Ruby says and Emma can't help but lurch at her best friend and pulling her into a hug.

"I love you so much Ruby!" Emma says and Ruby swears she can feel a shiver run down her spine.


	9. Chapter 9

Regina walks out of the hospital in quick steps. She can't do this! She walks faster until she's almost running. She sees people looking at her but she doesn't stop.

"Regina!" Emma yells from behind her. "Regina!" Regina shakes her head, she can't see clear anymore the tears are blocking her vision and she has to stop running to watch where she's going so she doesn't run into someone.

"Regina what's wrong." Emma asks watching how Regina places her hands on her knees and takes deep breaths. Regina looks around her and sees an alleyway. If she's going to have this conversation with Emma she doesn't want anyone to see her yelling into clear air.

"Regina please talk to me! What's going on? Why did you run?" Emma ask concerned when they are in the alley.

"I can't do this!" Regina shouts. "I can't be the one who tells everyone that you are going to die. I can't do that." Regina rubs angry in her eyes.

"Hey it's okay. My mom and Ruby were the only two I needed to contact. You don't have to do that again." Emma susses.

"Do you have any idea how hard this is?" Regina asks and Emma can clearly hear the despair in her voice.

"No I don't. And I'm sorry. Why don't we do something you want for the rest of the day." Emma asks and Regina stares at her only sniffling a little bit.

"So tell me Regina, what is your happy place?" Emma asks smiling when she sees the sparkle coming back into Regina's eyes.

"The beach."

Emma hadn't expect the beach to be Regina's happy place but when she saw the brunette walk on the sand with her shoes off and her head thrown back, her eyes closed she knew that the beach had a bigger meaning to her. They had stop by Regina's apartment first so the brunette could get some stuff before driving the small distance to the beach.

In the years Emma had lived in the city she had known that she was close to the ocean but still somehow she had never taken the time to go and explore this side of the city. She was happy that Regina was showing it to her now, it seems like she could learn from the brunette as well. The sun was high in the sky and reflected beautiful on the water. Emma let her eyes travel from the water to Regina and she felt her throat go dry.

Regina was pulling of her shirt revealing a black bikini top. Emma tried but she couldn't look away from every piece of olive skin that was revealed. Regina pushes her jeans of and threw them on the blanket before looking at Emma. She was pleased to see the blonde dumb struck standing behind her.

"So Emma? Is it possible for you to join me in the water?" Regina asks looking at the plain white shirt and jeans Emma was always wearing.

"I don't know. But I'm happy to find it out." Emma says and watches how Regina's smile slowly changes into a grin.

"Race you!" She shouts and starts running towards the water. Emma follows quickly behind and when her form hits the water she doesn't feel the wetness and her appearance doesn't change. Regina however shrieks when the cold water splashes against her stomach but she doesn't care it's what she loves. She takes a deep breath and takes a dive.

That's the moment, the moment she feels most alive. The dive into cold ocean water, eyes closed and body fully awake. She tries to stay under as long as possible. When air is necessary she comes back up, opens her eyes and is greated by the view of Emma standing right in front of her with the sun shining into her back. It's the most beautiful sight Regina has ever seen and if heaven excited she knew that this is how an angel would look like. Maybe that's what Emma was? An angel.

When Regina is too tired to swim they go back to the beach and lie next to each other on the blanket. Emma lies on her side facing Regina and watching how the little droplets of water glide over Regina's olive skin.

"Did you mean that?" Emma asks and Regina turns her head towards Emma not understanding what she means.

"What do you mean?"

"What you told Ruby, that I'm your friend." Emma says and Regina detects sadness in her statement. Why is she sad? Doesn't she want to be my friend.

"You don't have to be if you don't want to." Regina says turning her head back away and Emma sees how her walls are coming back up.

"I wish I wanted to be your friend." Emma says and Regina snaps her back and glares at Emma.

"What! Why not!" Regina asks angry. Yes Regina had been mean to the blonde but she had also be nice and friendly towards her, she thought she had deserved Emma's friendship.

"Because if I only wanted to be your friend this would have been easier. But I want so much more. I want you Regina, I want to love you and hold you and kiss you. I'm want to completely fall in love with you." Regina pushes herself up into a sitting position and watches how tears fall from Emma's eyes. She wanted her? Regina chuckles and feel her own eyes getting moist. How cruel can her live be.

"I have already fallen completely in love with you Emma and it hurts because I can't touch you or kiss you and I can't stop feeling like this."

Regina doesn't care that she won't feel Emma she just want to show her how much she wants her. She leans forward and imagines how her lips would feel on Emma's but Regina frowns when she indeed feels the soft flesh of Emma's lips. She pushes further deepening the kiss and feels a hand cupping her cheek. The hand is warm and soft. Regina and Emma open their eyes and look at each other in confusion.

"Emma…..I felt you." Regina says and tries to ignore the pressure she feels on her chest.

"Regina…are you okay? Regina?" Emma asks worried seeing how Regina's eyes are slowly becoming dull.

"My…..heart…." Regina breaths out putting her hand on her chest. She can't ignore the pressure anymore it's like someone is jumping on her chest.

Emma looks around the beach and sees several people lying on their blankets near them. Emma starts yelling and waving forgetting that no one can see her.

"Shit! Regina! Regina you need to scream! Regina! Scream!" Emma looks at Regina her eyes wide with fear. Regina cries out in pain and Emma hopes someone has heard her. Please! She looks around and sees how a couple in looking in their direction. They see Regina in agony and start running towards her.

"Please Regina! Stay here! Everything is going to okay. Please, I love you."

"You had another heart attack Regina." Doctor Whale says sitting on the edge of Regina's bed and checking her heart rhythm. Regina feels tired and it's difficult for her to breath.

"I'm sorry Regina but if we don't find you a heart in the next 12 hours…" He sighed. "You will probably die."

Regina doesn't look away from him and nods in understanding. "I understand. Thank you doctor Whale." She says holding back a sob. Doctor Whale looks down and gives her hand a squeeze. He hated giving people this kind of news. The only thing they could do now was wait and hope for a miracle.

The moment Whale closes the door of the room Emma is standing beside Regina's bed. She crutches down and takes a hold of Regina's hand. She can feel her and it makes her sad because it means that Regina is dying.

"It's time Regina." She says and her voice is hoarse from crying. "It's time to say goodbye."

Regina eyes grow wide and she starts shaking her head. "No! Emma! No." Emma pushes some strands from Regina's face.

"Please Emma, I don't deserve it. I have made so many mistakes in my life. And maybe if I die we can be together. Maybe we see each other." Regina says hopefully but Emma shakes her head.

"No! I want you to live! I need you to live! You do deserve this Regina. You showed me the real you and she is kind and sweet and I love her and I need you to see these things in yourself."

"I don't….I don't see them." Regina croaks out through her tears.

Emma smiles and leans forward. She kisses Regina and can taste their combined tears on her lips. "Well it's a good thing that I can see them and you don't have a choice in the matter." Emma lets go of Regina hands and takes a step back. Regina eyes grow wide when she sees Emma turn, walking out of her room.

"Emma! Please! Emma! Come back!" Regina pleads desperately.

Emma stands still for a second when she hears Regina shouting and pleading. She closes her eyes and blocks out the noise before she starts walking again. The tears keep falling down her face while she walks down the walls of the hospital that had become her home for so long.

She passes Ruby who is pushing a wheelchair with a grumpy old lady in it. The lady is rude but her friend keeps smiling. Children are running down the halls, playing, laughing and crying. People are sitting in rooms or waiting in the halls. Emotions crossing over their faces. Emotions Emma can understand. They feel sadness, anger, happiness but also confusion while doctors tell them how their lives have changed.

She walks further and enters her own room. There she lies her own body had become her prison. A prison she would break out of today.

Her mother is in the room. She is sitting there like every other day. She hopes when she's gone that she will pick up her live. It's time to set her free as well. Emma walks closer and watches how her mother's eyes travel across the book that she's reading. Emma kneels in front of her and places her hands on her mother's knees. They don't feel the contact.

"Mom." Emma says through sobs. "I love you." She pushes herself up and gives her a kiss on her forehead.

A small shiver runs down Mary's back. She looks up from her book and watches her daughter's lifeless body. "Emma?" She asks and she can't find the reason why she's asking.

Before Mary knows what's happening the machine starts beeping making her jump up. She walks over to the machine and without needing to think further she reaches out and presses the red button on the wall.

Nurses enter the room and check the machine to know what has happened. Emma's condition is rapidly getting worse. Mary hears the nurses mutter that they don't understand. Doctors are getting called and they starts giving Emma fluids.

"What's happening." Mary asks looking at the nurses but none can give her a clear answer.

"Where's losing her." One nurse bravely answers.

"What! How is that even possible?" The nurse looks at her not knowing what to say.

"We don't know….it's like." The nurse looks at Emma for a second. "It's like she's giving up."

Mary snaps her head back at Emma and walks closer. She takes her daughter's hand and holds it close to her lips. Giving up? She's giving up. That's not who her daughter is. She doesn't give up.

"No." Mary says her voice softening. "She isn't giving up. She's ready, she's ready to go. She's saying goodbye." She let her fingers trace over Emma's cheek and leans down to give her a kiss.

"It's okay sweetheart. You were saying goodbye when Regina was here, didn't you? It's okay I believe her. I'll go out with David." Mary chuckles through her sobs. "I'll be fine. I love you so much Emma. It's okay you can go now." Mary's vision is blurry but she doesn't care she will keep watching until Emma's last heartbeat.

Regina is staring at the ceiling. She feels numb, she can't see Emma. She isn't here. She feels frustrated she wants Emma here. She wants her to walk through the door and smile at her. Regina turns her head at the door and for a second her heart fills itself with hope when the door opens but seeing doctor Whale running in with a smile on his face fills her heart with sadness. Doctor Whale doesn't have to say anything because she already knows why he's here.

"We have a heart."


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I had already posted this story on fanfiction.net and I got some reviews that people wanted to see a happy ending. SO I'm going to do what I did there and I have two endings, This one will be sad and the next chapter will be the happy ending.

Regina feels herself shaking. They are rolling her bed down the halls towards the operating rooms, she's scared and she's all alone. They push her down a double door before entering the operating room. Doctor Whale isn't there yet. They lift her from her bed and place her on the table.

She looks around completely terrified but all the sudden finds comfort in the hand that is gripping hers.

"It's okay Regina. You are going to be okay." Regina looks at the person who is talking at her. The nurse is wearing a mask but Regina's knows her eyes.

"Ruby…."Regina whispers and Ruby nods. Doctor Whale walks in the room fully scrub and he looks down at Regina.

"Are you comfortable Regina? Good! The heart is here and it's a good one. I have high hopes." Regina nods nervously and squeezes Ruby's hand.

"Alright I want you to count back from ten to nine." Doctor Whale says while another nurse holds a mask in front of Regina's face.

"Ten…nine….eight…..se…ven…..si….fi…"Regina drifts into darkness.

What happens when we die? No one knows the answer to that question and so many people have asked that question before. Do we leave and go somewhere else? Somewhere good or somewhere bad? Do we return in another form? So many questions and so many ideas to that question. The question no one can answer.

"Regina." A voice whispers close by Regina's ear. Regina frowns because she knows the voice all too well.

"Emma?" Regina asks slowly opening her eyes. Emma is sitting next to her and Regina feels Emma's hand on her cheek and she can see Emma smiling down her.

"I'm here Regina." Emma says her dump slowly caressing over her cheek. Regina places her hand over Emma's and lean in to the touch. She feels wonderful having Emma with her. She closes her eyes again and for just a moment she forgets what had just happened, for a moment she hopes that having her here is a good sign. But then she opens her eyes again and sees how little tears fall across Emma's face and how white the room is where she is lying in. No door or window, a big white space without even a breeze of air.

"Where are we Emma?" Regina asks worried. She wants to get up but Emma stops her. Instead Emma lies down on her side and holds Regina in her arms. Regina buries her head inside Emma's neck and breathes in her scent. She smells like cinnamon and something flowery. Emma's hand is rubbing circles into her back and Regina wishes they could they here forever.

"Emma….?" Regina asks again.

"I'll always be with you Regina. Nothing can change that now." Emma holds her a little closer.

"What's going to happen now?" They pull back a little so they can see each other eyes.

"We stay like this until you wake up." Emma says.

"So this all isn't real. I'm only dreaming this?" Regina asks sadly. Emma chuckles and pushes Regina raven hair out of her face.

"And what's so wrong with that?" Emma kisses Regina on the nose before kissing her on the lips. "You can dream about me and think about me as much as you like but just promise me that you never forget that this is the person you are. I'll will always love you Regina and I'll always be with you but you will not see me anymore, when you wake up." Regina understands and pulls Emma back to her. She just wants to hold her a little longer.

"I want you to live your life fully. Go have your baby, go and find someone to love. I have given you my heart and I need you to find someone to share it with." Emma can feel Regina sobbing and nodding.

"I will Emma. I love you." Regina says. She wants to open her eyes again but they are too heavy. She feels herself growing more tired and she is losing Emma's touch. She's waking up.

"Goodbye Regina." Emma whispers.

Regina looks in the mirror and adjusts her blouse. She should have bought it in a bigger size the last button is straining and she fears that it might pop up and reveal her scar. Regina smiles, sometimes she doesn't like the way the scar looks and she doesn't like the questions people ask her about it but it also is a reminder of Emma. She will never forget Emma.

"Miss Mills? They are ready for you." Jessica says opening the door from the bathroom and stepping inside.

"Thanks Jessica and remember my name is Regina." Regina says chuckling while applying just a little more lipstick. She sees how Jessica watches her in the mirror, a small blush covering her co-manager's cheeks.

"What do you think of the blouse Jessica? It's not too small is it?" Regina asks turning towards Jessica and pushing up her breasts a little more. She loves how Jessica's breath hitches and she can't stop staring at her chest.

"It's lovely Regina." Jessica manages to say and Regina gives her a little wink.

They both leave the bathroom and Regina smiles a genuine smile when she goes to sit behind the little desk in the bookshop. People are waiting in line for her autograph. After the surgery Regina had a lot of time because her body needed to recover. She had taken the time to do something she felt like she needed to. She had written a book, a book about her and Emma. Their time together but also the time they would have had if they had met under different circumstances. Regina closes her eyes and feels how her heart beats inside her chest. She opens the first book and let her fingers trace of the title "All that matters is my heart" by Regina Mills for my true love Emma.


	11. Chapter 11

Regina feels herself shaking. Their rolling her bed down the halls towards the operating rooms, she's scared and she's all alone. They push her down a double door and enter the operating room. Doctor Whale isn't their yet. They lift her from her bed and place her on the table.

She looks around completely terrified but all the sudden finds comfort in the hand that is gripping hers.

"It's okay Regina. You are going to be okay." Regina looks at the person who is talking at her. The nurse is wearing a mask but Regina's knows her eyes.

"Ruby…."Regina whispers and Ruby nods. Doctor Whale walks in the room fully scrub and he looks down at Regina.

"Are you comfortable Regina? Good! The heart is here and it's a good one. I have high hopes." Regina nods nervously and squeezes Ruby's hand.

"Alright I want you to count back from ten to nine." Doctor Whale says while another nurse holds a mask in front of Regina's face.

"Ten…nine….eight…..se…ven…..si….fi…"Regina drifts into darkness.

What happens when we die? No one knows the answer to that question and so many people have asked that question before. Do we leave and go somewhere else? Somewhere good or somewhere bad? Do we return in another form? So many questions and so many ideas to that question. The question no one can answer.

"Regina." A voice whispers close by Regina's ear. Regina frowns because she knows the voice all too well.

"Emma?" Regina asks slowly opening her eyes. Emma is sitting next to her and Regina feels Emma's hand on her cheek and she can see Emma smiling down her.

"I'm here Regina." Emma says her dump slowly caressing over her cheek. Regina places her hand over Emma's and leans in to the touch. She frowns when she can hear the chatter of people around her and the beeping of a machine close by. She opens her eyes further and when her vision becomes clear she finds herself lying inside a hospital room and Emma is sitting next to her.

"What happened?" Regina asks in a hoarse voice but before Emma can answer her a cheerful Ruby enters the room and checks Regina's vitals.

"Hello Regina, how are you feeling? Are you feeling any pain?" Ruby asks taking Regina's chart and filling it in. Regina shakes her head and looks back at Emma, still waiting for an answer.

"Great, Emma will you let me know if she does feel any discomfort?" Ruby asks Emma and the blonde nods.

"She can see you?" Regina asks confused and it's that moment she realised that Emma is no longer in her jeans and white shirt but she's wearing some hideous hospital gown. She also realises that she can feel Emma's hand against her cheek and it warm and soft.

"What happened?" Regina asks again.

Emma smiles and takes Regina's hand in hers. "I don't know how but I woke up." Emma states and Regina eye grow wide.

"So you're really here?" Emma nods holding back her tears of joy.

"But I had surgery? Who's heart did a get?" Regina asks trying to push herself up so she can see her chest.

"It's okay, they found a heart that was a match. I don't know from who." Regina nods and understands. She can't believe this is real. Emma's here and she can touch her and see her and….

"Kiss me!" Regina asks and Emma is more than happy to obey.

3 Months later

"Okay let's go over the contract one more time." Regina says sitting next to Jessica and reading over the paper. She nods and scribbles down some things but it's really good.

"Really good Jessica, I couldn't have done it better." Jessica smiles and nod. In the few weeks they have been working together the girl and really improved herself. Regina was proud of her co-manager.

There was a hard knock on the door and before Regina could say enter, a hysterical looking Emma opens the door and Regina's new assistant tries to calm her fiancée.

"I'm sorry miss Mills, I couldn't calm her down." The girls says but Regina waves her off.

"It's alright, Christina. I'll calm her down." Regina says walking over to the blonde who is breathing heaving and looking like she had just ran a marathon.

"Emma honey. Calm down, What gotten you so excited." Regina asks putting a hand on Emma's shoulder. Emma breathes in a relaxes herself before looking at Regina and pulling her in a hug and squeezing her tightly.

"huhuuh Emma…Emma I can't breathe. Can you please explain yourself." Emma pulls away and takes Regina hands in hers.

"They called! They called!" Regina rolls her eyes.

"Emma honey, who called? Use your words."

Emma nods. "The agency! The adoption agency! We are getting a baby!"


End file.
